This is mercifuly short. I say that not because it's bad (it isn't). I say that because I just wrote a religion final, but for some reason still feel compelled to critique this. I must be a masochist.

Enough about me! This is all about you. First of all: The Rhythm!

Mm. A beautiful rhythm, too. I love tetrameter. It's so.. oh, I don't know. It makes everything feel so much more beautiful and romantic, and goodness you use it so gorgeously in this peace! I also actually like how you cut the rhythm short in the second last line, fitting in perfectly with the sense of deprivation you're encountering! Incredibly. I love it.

The language you use also adds to the sense of the romantic, the Victorian sense giving it an air of mystical qualities, some how antiquated yet current all at once. That being said, I found more originality in the short length and less in the imagery you use. While I'm not faulting you a whole lot for using familiar images, I think you could have perhaps tried to stretch the style a little further.

The length did help to deliver on the impact, and you did a great job of making your message clear yet delivered very artistically, and I think you deserve credit for that. Again, perhaps some more original imagery might have helped you make the impact of the piece a little stronger, but we're all only human, aren't we?

Overall, I think this is a wonderful piece and I want you to keep up the good work!